Alfred Adler was an influential 20th-century Austrian psychologist. Adler believed that the goal of psychology was to help people live effectively. By Adler's definition, someone is living effectively when they feel a sense of belonging in the world around them.
Adler teaches how psychology can help us understand what drives the decision making of human beings. When we understand human nature, we can change both our own lives and the lives of others. Adler believes that understanding human nature ultimately allows us to be more compassionate.
I’d like to share my biggest takeaways from Alfred Adler's, Understanding Human Nature.
Compassion results from understanding
Human beings are a result of their culture, experiences, and values. Adler states that one cannot understand human nature if we view it as an "isolated phenomenon that has been taken out of its' whole psychological context."
If our goal is to understand people and ourselves, we must understand what sort of experiences and emotions drive decision making. Adler states that we must view human nature, "in relation to its environment, receiving and responding to stimuli from outside."
When we understand a person's past experience, we see what forces molded them into what they are. This clear understanding allows us to be more empathetic. We no longer view human behavior as a result of randomness, but as an equation where certain inputs produce an exact output.
Forces that are out of our control have a profound impact on our lives. The best thing we can do for those experiencing hardship is to provide compassion and understanding. Adler goes as far to say that empathy is a societal obligation, because:
"They are not responsible for it (experiencing hardship). We must uphold to the end their right to their indignation, and we must not forget that we are partly to blame for their situation. The blame belongs to us because we have not done enough to prevent the social misery that produced it. If we stick to this point of view we can eventually improve the situation."
Behavior is a compensation for insecurity
Adler believes that each of our actions are driven by a need to cure a deep-seated insecurity. This idea is known as the inferiority complex. This complex is defined as "feelings of inferiority or inadequacy that produce stress, psychological evasions, and a compensatory drive towards an illusory sense of superiority."
We act in ways that are not helpful to positive relationships when we feel insecure. Insecurity makes us jealous, angry, and vain. We develop these negative traits as a protective response to something bad that happened to us in our past. This is because our behavior is biologically determined to guarantee safety. If for some reason we felt insecure in our past, we developed distinct personality traits to compensate for the insecurity. If we are not conscious of how these insecurities negatively command our behavior, we risk estranging ourselves from our community, something Adler views as the ultimate concern.
The way to become aware of our insecurities is through understanding the origins and dynamics of our thoughts. By being able to understand what conditions give rise to negative traits, we give our negative emotions less power over us. This task is not easy, Adler goes as far as to say that, "The hardest thing for human beings to do is to know themselves and to change themselves."
Take ownership of your life
The biggest roadblock to personal growth is the victim mentality. Adler defines this way of thinking as a person who "justifies his behavior and puts himself above criticism. He is never to blame. It’s always someone else’s fault if he did not achieve what he set out to do."
By adopting the victim mentality, we absolve ourselves of personal responsibility for our lot in life. This makes the quality and outcome of our lives is out of our control. When someone with a victim mentality faces a challenge, they look for someone to blame rather than acknowledging what they could have done to avoid the situation.
The best way to escape the victim mentality is to take personal ownership for everything that happens to you. It is only when we believe that we are in control of our own destiny that we have the power to enact large personal change.
Famous life-coach Tony Robbins describes this shift in belief from "life is happening to me" to "life is happening for me".
Conclusion
I found Adler's book to be an illuminating study of human nature. After reading his book, I feel equipped to be more understanding and more compassionate to those around me. I highly recommend this book to anyone interested in psychology.
Commenti